Cops - Salem

Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when they come for you.......

Night shift - 8:30 PM

"Well I decided to join the force, well when I couldn't figure out anything else to do with my life." Shawn Brady says to the camera as they drive along the streets of Salem.

"I designed engines, I worked as a mechanic. . .so I figured police work was the next logical choice" he rambles

Car 29 we have a disturbance at the Cheatin' Heart fight in progress, please respond.

Shawn looks around the car, "Did you hear that voice? I keep hearing voices every time I'm in this car. They want me to go places and tell me about all these horrible things!"

"Um..that's the car radio, someone needs the police, you know a crime?" the camera man says

"But what do they expect me to do?" Shawn asks "If two guys want to fight what do I care?"

"It's your JOB?" the camera man is totally confused "Look guy, we aren't even supposed to talk to you, we're just here to observe."

"So I'm just supposed to go over to the Cheatin' Heart and try to stop a fight?" Shawn asks "Okay.....if you say so"

Shawn turns the corner and heads towards the bar.

"Do you believe this guy?" one camera guy says to the other "I've seen some stupid cops before, but this guy brings new meaning to the word."

Shawn pulls up in front of the Cheatin Heart in time to see two guys crash out through the door, throwing punches.

The camera men jump out of the car and start filming. After a few seconds they start looking around, realizing Shawn isn't in the shot. The camera pans around to see him. Sitting in the car, with the doors locked, screaming like a little girl.

The guys fighting hear Shawn's screams and stop. They stare at the squad car, then start to walk over to it.
Shawn freaks and scrambles out the passenger side. He stands next to the car and begins frantically pulling at his gun.

The two thugs are completely engrossed now. Shawn's frantic attempts bear an uncanny resemblance to Barney Fife. Even the camera men have given up their assigned shots and started filming Shawn.

He finally manages to free his gun from his holster and starts waving it in the general direction of the thugs.

"SHOP OR I'LL STOOT, um I mean STOP OR I'LL SHOOT!" Shawn stammers

The camera man dissolve into fits of uncontrollable laughter. The thugs are now hugging each other trying to control themselves as they too laugh hysterically.

"I mean it" Shawn tries to sound stern "Oh come on you guys, I'm serious."

"Oh, okay officer, you got us" One thug says "We'll come quietly"

"Should we just go ahead and cuff ourselves?" The other asks

Shawn figures out they're being sarcastic and puts his gun back in the holster, not without a couple missed attempts of course.

"Forget it," he says "I'm just going to get back in the car and leave. Are you two coming?" Shawn asks the camera men

"Yeah, we need footage for our bloopers show anyway" a camera guy says

Once they are back in the car, Shawn drives in silence with his jaw working overtime. His cell phone rings.

"Belle?" He answers "Belle what's wrong? Claire is being held in the warehouse by the dock? Stefano is there with her? I'm on my way!"

The camera guys look confused. "Did you say Stefano? As in Dimera?"

"Yeah, he has my daughter and I'm going after him!" Shawn cranks the wheel and does a 180 in the middle of the street. He punches the gas and the squad car screams down the street.

The camera men, start to get excited. "Maybe this guy isn't the wuss we thought he was" one says
"Yeah, I mean anyone who takes on Stefano Dimera" says the other.

"That's the warehouse!" Shawn says as they whip sideways around the corner "I'm going in!"

He stomps on the accelerator and aims the car right at the side of the building.

"Hey dude, STOP! YOU'RE GONNA CRASH RIGHT INTO........."

The cameraman is too late. Shawn goes smashing through the side of the building and into the middle of .....

His entire family standing around under a banner reading:
Congratulations on Your Graduation From Police Academy

As the last stray brick falls on top of the car, and the dust settles, Shawn crawls out through the broken windshield, followed by the camera men.

"Claire! Where's Claire???" Shawn moans.

Belle rushes up holding Claire "SHAWN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING???"

"You said Stefano had Claire, I came to rescue her." Shawn answers

"No Shawn" Belle says "I SAID I got Claire a new DRESS TO SHOW you, and we'll meet you at the corner BY the warehouse."
Belle is totally humiliated "Shawn, we talked about this, Claire is fine, Stefano went away 3 months ago." she says through gritted teeth

"But, but" Shawn's jaw drops as he looks around

The whole Brady family along with most of the Salem Police are standing there staring. Bo looks like he's going to have a stroke. Roman is shaking his head in disbelief. Hope's eyes are bugging out of her head as she hyperventilates.
Max is holding out his hand as Phillip counts money into his hand, both are laughing.

"This was supposed to be a surprise!" Belle says "We were all so proud of you and now, well now I guess we'll just forget about it."

"But Belle, Belle! I'm sorry" Shawn tries to apologize as Belle storms off.

"You did get all that didn't you?" the first camera guys says.

"I didn't miss a second" the other answers "I think this will be the first time a bloopers show ever wins and Emmy!"