Shirley Partridge aka Colleen Brady: The Saga Conintues

After explaining at length, the complicated story of how she met and fell in love with Santo Dimera, left the convent to run away with him, found out he was still married, and faked her own death, Shirley paused to see if the kids had any questions.

*~~*~~* crickets *~~*~~*

"No one has ANY questions?" She asked, a little shocked.

"It still sounds like a plot from Days of Our Lives" Chris said yawning

"Oil roit then, ye coin jes rot in Hades then!" Shirley gets so P.O.'d she slips into Colleen's bad Irish accent. "Oi abandoned me Da, the Chorch, broke me promise to the Laird, and left me leetle brother alone, awl these yers, fer nuttin Oi guess."

Now the kids were awake. The sat with their jaws dropped staring at the woman they thought was their mother.

"Whoa mom!" Danny exclaimed "That was freaky! I've never heard you talk like that!"

"Well Danny" Shirley said, calming herself enough to re-gain her California accent "You kids just don't understand what I've gone through all these year, carrying around this secret!"

"We're sorry mom" Laurie says "So now what's changed that made you decide to tell us?"

Shirley then launches into the story of Stefano Dimera, and his evil V-word. How he has tormented and exacted revenge on the Brady family for all these years.
She tells them she spent years hiding from Santo and then later Stefano. She explains that when she married their dad, she insisted they move to California and cut themselves off from anyone who ever knew them.
But over the years she still sent Stefano letters, reminding him she would never forgive him for ruining her one chance at happiness.

Shirley looks around the room at her kids. Chris and Tracy were both asleep on the couch. Danny had turned the TV on and was watching the Bloomberg Report. Keith was listening to his I-Pod and playing a game on his PSP, while Laurie sat texting on her cell phone.

Shirley sighed. "Well I see none of you are interested so I'll just go ahead upstairs and start packing."

This got the kids attention.

"Packing?" Keith asked "Where are you going?"

"I have to return to Salem" Shirley said "I have to go back and face Stefano to put things right."

"But won't he kill you?" Laurie gasped

"He might" Shirley answered "But luckily in Salem no one ever stays dead"

The kids looked confused

"Never mind" Shirley said "Now I will be gone for a few weeks or months, or however long it takes to beat this storyline into the ground, so you kids will have to fend for yourselves. Are you sure you can handle it?"

"Mom?" Danny began "I hate to break this to you but, Keith will be 60 next year, Laurie's on her third husband and has 2 grand kids, Chris is a race car driver, Tracy owns a bookstore, and I have had my own reality TV show and am getting ready for my 6th or 7th stint in re-hab. None of us have lived at home for years, you just didn't notice."

Shirley looks at the kids and struggles to re-gain what little composure she can.

"Well then, I guess you will be okay." Shirley sighs "Did I mention I'll be taking on an evil villain? A master of deception and manipulation. A man who can make people disappear for years without a trace, then bring them back right when it suits his evil plans......yeah okay, I'm going to pack."

Shirley goes upstairs.
Once she's gone Keith turns to Danny. "I thought you told me she was on her meds!"

"She was!" Danny says "But when she got the call from NBC she just kind of lost it. She actually thinks she IS the long lost Colleen Brady."

"And her psychiatrist said we should just play along." Laurie adds "It could be too much of a shock to her system and she might end up doing nude scenes in bad movies again. You remember don't you? Someone left the TV on the wrong station and she accidentally saw Danny's reality show."

"Yeah," Chris says "And she was so traumatized she ended up doing that movie, Grandma's Boy. You know, the one where she's this cougar who has slept with 1000's of men and sleeps with this guy who's a virgin. And the nude scene....."

They all shudder.

From upstairs Shirley calls down "Danny me boi. Could ye go out to the bairn and fetch me big suitcase? Oil be needin to pack me old habit and it takes up a lotta room. And check to make sure we have toime to stop by the chorch before Oi leave. The Larid winna take kindly to me not sayin' a rosary ar two afore Oi go to take on Stefano."

"Okay, mom" Danny answers

They all shake their heads and sigh together.